Q: Once there was a family called the Biggers. There was Mr. Bigger,
Mrs. Bigger, and their son. Who was bigger, Mr. Bigger or his son?
A: His son, because he’s a little Bigger!
Submitted by: Mariel
Q: What is worse then having one baby screaming?
A: Two babies screaming!
Submitted by: Macauly
Q: Why did the boy take a ruler to bed?
A: To see how long he slept.
Q: Why did the melon jump into the lake?
A: It wanted to be a watermelon.
Submitted by: elizabeth
Q: What has four wheels and flies?
A: A garbage truck.
Submitted by: Nancy
Q: Why was the boy sitting on his watch?
A: Because he wanted to be on time.
Submitted by: Lidya
Q: What did the little boy’s mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?
A: “Tell Jim to buy his own shoes”.
Submitted by: Lori
Q: What has three letters and and starts with gas?
A: A car
Submitted by: puppy love
Q: Why can’t a bicycle stand up?
A: Because it’s two tired!
Q: Can you say Richard and Robert had a rabbit without using the “r” sound?
A: Sure, Dick and Bob had a bunny!
Submitted by: Colleen
Q: What 7 letters did Lizzy say when she opened the refrigerator and found it empty?
A: O I C U R M T
Submitted by: Koo-Koo head
Q: What goes under your feet and over your head?
A: A jump rope.
Submitted by: Brandon
Q: Why did the scientist take out his doorbell?
A: He wanted to win the no-bell prize!
Submitted by: Kayli
Q: What did the belly button say just before it left?
A: I’m outtie here!
Submitted by: Kim
Tom: I bet I can make you say purple.
Joe: How?
Tom: What colors are in the American flag?
Joe: Red, white and blue.
Tom: I told you I can make you say red.
Joe: You said purple!
Tom: I told you I could make you say purple!
Submitted by: pooh bear
Q:Why did the opera singer go sailing?
A: Because she wanted to hit the high C’s.
Submitted by: butterfly
Q: What`s black & white & red all over?
A: An embarrased mime!
Submitted by: Buttercup
Q: What kind of potato chips fly?
A: Plane ones.
Submitted by: Nina
Q: What did one tooth say to the other tooth?
A: The dentist is taking me out tonight.
Submitted by: Melbahee
A man was driving in his car got a call from his wife on his cell phone. She was really frantic and yelled, “Honey, I just heard on the news that there is a car going the wrong way on the highway! Be careful!”
He replied, “Honey, there isn’t just one, there are hundreds of them!”
Submitted by: Kristin
Q: How did the butcher introduce his wife?
A: Meet Patty.
Submitted by: Lizzy Lou
Q: What did the laywer name his daughter?
A: Sue.
Submitted by: Lizzy Lou
Q: What has a head but no body?
A: A nail.
Submitted by: Emily
Q: What did one egg say to the other egg?
A: You crack me up!
Submitted by: Nicky
Q: What do a baker and a millionaire have in common?
A: They are both rolling in the dough!
Submitted by: Samantha
A man was looking for a person to paint her porch, so he hired a young lady and told her what to do. After about 30 minutes, the lady came to the door and said “I’m done.” The man asked “how did you get done so fast?” The lady said “it was hard at first, but it got easier towards the end. And by the way, it’s a Ferrarri not a Porsche.”
Submitted by: Jaylene
Q: Why did the man take a pencil to bed?
A: Because he wanted to draw the curtains!
Submitted by: Shang
Q: Why did the gardener plant his money?
A: He wanted his soil to be rich!
Submitted by: emily
Q: What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?
A: No thank you, I’m stuffed.
Q: What did the calculator say to the math student?
A: You can count on me!
Q: Why did the banana split?
A: It saw the ginger snap.
Q: Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?
A: She was caught taking a brake.
Q: Why are kindergarten teachers so good?
A: They can make little things count.
Q: When are kids most likely to go to school?
A: When the door is open.
Q: What letter can you drink?
A: T (tea)
Submitted by: Kayla
Q: Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?
A: No one can eat just one potato ship.
Submitted by: David
Q: What happened when the monster ate the electric company?
A: He was in shock for a week.
Submitted by: David
Q: What do sea monsters eat for lunch?
A: Fish and ships.
Submitted by: David
Q: When is a car not a car?
A: When it turns into a garage.
Q: Why did the tree go to the dentist?
A: It needed a root canal.
Q: What is always hot in the refrigerator?
A: Chili
Submitted by: Yue
Q: What’s the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?
A: Sherlock Bones.
Q: What did one flower say to the other flower?
A: Hey, bud!
Q: Why was the vacationing doctor so mad?
A: He had no patients.
Q: How do you cut a wave in half?
A: Use a sea saw.
Q: What did Delaware?
A: A New Jersey.
Q: Why was the baseball player arrested in the middle of the game?
A: He was caught stealing second base.
Q: How did Ben Franklin feel after discovering electricity?
A: Shocked.
Q: What do basketball players and babies have in common?
A: They both dribble.
Q: Why did the football coach go to the bank?
A: To get his quarterback.
Q: If you drop a white hat into the Red Sea, what does it become?
A: Wet.
Q: What kind of dress can’t be worn?
A: Address.
Submitted by: Jocelyn
Q: Why did the girl throw the butter out the window?
A: She wanted to see a butterfly.
Submitted by: Sara the Comedian
Q: What has legs but doesn’t walk?
A: A bed.
Submitted by: Jessica
Q: What’s green and flies as fast as a speeding bullet?
A: Super Pickle!
Submitted by: Gherkin
Q: What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?
A: Fireballs.
Submitted by: David
Q: What washes up on small beaches?
A: Microwaves.
Submitted by: Desta
Q: Where do all the letters sleep?
A: In the alphabed.
Submitted by: Xandi
A: His son, because he’s a little Bigger!
Submitted by: Mariel
Q: What is worse then having one baby screaming?
A: Two babies screaming!
Submitted by: Macauly
Q: Why did the boy take a ruler to bed?
A: To see how long he slept.
Q: Why did the melon jump into the lake?
A: It wanted to be a watermelon.
Submitted by: elizabeth
Q: What has four wheels and flies?
A: A garbage truck.
Submitted by: Nancy
Q: Why was the boy sitting on his watch?
A: Because he wanted to be on time.
Submitted by: Lidya
Q: What did the little boy’s mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?
A: “Tell Jim to buy his own shoes”.
Submitted by: Lori
Q: What has three letters and and starts with gas?
A: A car
Submitted by: puppy love
Q: Why can’t a bicycle stand up?
A: Because it’s two tired!
Q: Can you say Richard and Robert had a rabbit without using the “r” sound?
A: Sure, Dick and Bob had a bunny!
Submitted by: Colleen
Q: What 7 letters did Lizzy say when she opened the refrigerator and found it empty?
A: O I C U R M T
Submitted by: Koo-Koo head
Q: What goes under your feet and over your head?
A: A jump rope.
Submitted by: Brandon
Q: Why did the scientist take out his doorbell?
A: He wanted to win the no-bell prize!
Submitted by: Kayli
Q: What did the belly button say just before it left?
A: I’m outtie here!
Submitted by: Kim
Tom: I bet I can make you say purple.
Joe: How?
Tom: What colors are in the American flag?
Joe: Red, white and blue.
Tom: I told you I can make you say red.
Joe: You said purple!
Tom: I told you I could make you say purple!
Submitted by: pooh bear
Q:Why did the opera singer go sailing?
A: Because she wanted to hit the high C’s.
Submitted by: butterfly
Q: What`s black & white & red all over?
A: An embarrased mime!
Submitted by: Buttercup
Q: What kind of potato chips fly?
A: Plane ones.
Submitted by: Nina
Q: What did one tooth say to the other tooth?
A: The dentist is taking me out tonight.
Submitted by: Melbahee
A man was driving in his car got a call from his wife on his cell phone. She was really frantic and yelled, “Honey, I just heard on the news that there is a car going the wrong way on the highway! Be careful!”
He replied, “Honey, there isn’t just one, there are hundreds of them!”
Submitted by: Kristin
Q: How did the butcher introduce his wife?
A: Meet Patty.
Submitted by: Lizzy Lou
Q: What did the laywer name his daughter?
A: Sue.
Submitted by: Lizzy Lou
Q: What has a head but no body?
A: A nail.
Submitted by: Emily
Q: What did one egg say to the other egg?
A: You crack me up!
Submitted by: Nicky
Q: What do a baker and a millionaire have in common?
A: They are both rolling in the dough!
Submitted by: Samantha
A man was looking for a person to paint her porch, so he hired a young lady and told her what to do. After about 30 minutes, the lady came to the door and said “I’m done.” The man asked “how did you get done so fast?” The lady said “it was hard at first, but it got easier towards the end. And by the way, it’s a Ferrarri not a Porsche.”
Submitted by: Jaylene
Q: Why did the man take a pencil to bed?
A: Because he wanted to draw the curtains!
Submitted by: Shang
Q: Why did the gardener plant his money?
A: He wanted his soil to be rich!
Submitted by: emily
Q: What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?
A: No thank you, I’m stuffed.
Q: What did the calculator say to the math student?
A: You can count on me!
Q: Why did the banana split?
A: It saw the ginger snap.
Q: Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?
A: She was caught taking a brake.
Q: Why are kindergarten teachers so good?
A: They can make little things count.
Q: When are kids most likely to go to school?
A: When the door is open.
Q: What letter can you drink?
A: T (tea)
Submitted by: Kayla
Q: Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?
A: No one can eat just one potato ship.
Submitted by: David
Q: What happened when the monster ate the electric company?
A: He was in shock for a week.
Submitted by: David
Q: What do sea monsters eat for lunch?
A: Fish and ships.
Submitted by: David
Q: When is a car not a car?
A: When it turns into a garage.
Q: Why did the tree go to the dentist?
A: It needed a root canal.
Q: What is always hot in the refrigerator?
A: Chili
Submitted by: Yue
Q: What’s the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?
A: Sherlock Bones.
Q: What did one flower say to the other flower?
A: Hey, bud!
Q: Why was the vacationing doctor so mad?
A: He had no patients.
Q: How do you cut a wave in half?
A: Use a sea saw.
Q: What did Delaware?
A: A New Jersey.
Q: Why was the baseball player arrested in the middle of the game?
A: He was caught stealing second base.
Q: How did Ben Franklin feel after discovering electricity?
A: Shocked.
Q: What do basketball players and babies have in common?
A: They both dribble.
Q: Why did the football coach go to the bank?
A: To get his quarterback.
Q: If you drop a white hat into the Red Sea, what does it become?
A: Wet.
Q: What kind of dress can’t be worn?
A: Address.
Submitted by: Jocelyn
Q: Why did the girl throw the butter out the window?
A: She wanted to see a butterfly.
Submitted by: Sara the Comedian
Q: What has legs but doesn’t walk?
A: A bed.
Submitted by: Jessica
Q: What’s green and flies as fast as a speeding bullet?
A: Super Pickle!
Submitted by: Gherkin
Q: What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?
A: Fireballs.
Submitted by: David
Q: What washes up on small beaches?
A: Microwaves.
Submitted by: Desta
Q: Where do all the letters sleep?
A: In the alphabed.
Submitted by: Xandi
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